Model the Behaviors You Want

“ How can I get a young employee to not send and receive text messages while I’m talking to them? “

“Since I want my employees to ‘step up to the plate’ why would they mock me when I’m lecturing them about what they need to do?”

Michael Goldsmith gives the answer in his book “What Got You Here Won’t Get You There.”

“When you’re not listening you’re sending out an armada of negative messages.

You’re saying:
I don’t care about you.
I don’t understand you.
You’re wrong.
You’re stupid.
You’re wasting my time.
All of the above.

The only time that people actually see that you’re not listening to them is when you’re displaying extreme impatience. You want them to hurry up and get to the point.
People notice that.

In the old days, junior (employees) might not have had a better option for employment. It was a choice between one big company and another.

Today, these junior (employees) have the option of working in small start ups, ( corporations, public sector) or venturing out on their own. They’re not hostages to a bunch of old men in white shirts.

The reality for leaders of the past and leaders in the future is that in the past very bright people would put up with disrespectful behavior but in the future, they will leave.

When you find yourself mentally or literally drumming your fingers while someone else is talking, stop the drumming. Stop demonstrating impatience when listening to someone. Stop saying (or thinking) NEXT! It’s not only rude and annoying, but its sure to inspire your employees to find their next boss. “

Your actions speak as loud as your voice. If you want respect, show respect. If you want people to act, get out of their way. Become a good listener. Become a great leader.

Model the Behaviors You Want.
Happy Summer, Ruth

Ruth Schwartz

Ruth Schwartz is the author of "The Key to the Golden Handcuffs". She is a high performance business consultant and leadership coach. Connect with Ruth to participate in the conversation. Google+, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube .